Are you looking for career growth? Are you targeting your boss’ seat or maybe even his/her boss’ seat?! If so, it shows you have the passion and the desire to lead. You want to be empowered to deliver results.

This article is for people who are aspiring to get to the top and also for people at the top who are looking for their successors.

People get motivated by different things and for different reasons to get to the top. For some, it could be the job title, the car, social status, an improved standard of living or even a fat pay check. While for others it could be the challenge in itself, or an opportunity to learn and grow or an opportunity to make a difference. Whatever your motivation, always remain motivated, particularly in crunch moments, along your journey to the top!

I often come across people who share with me their desire to grow. However, they mostly look for instant solutions in a ’2-minute noodle economy’.  In such situations I also give an instant ‘pep’ talk! The deeper you explore the more you discover, for example, absorbing a 2-mins pep-talk can be easy, but applying the principles is the tough part.

In one of my previous articles , I had clearly specified that you first need to ‘be’ and then earn what you intend ‘being’. For instance, pilots initially learn flying, not by actually flying in a real plane, but in simulators on the ground. Simulate some of the key characteristics you observe in your chosen role model, but not only the way the person talks or dresses. This is just the tip of the iceberg. Go deeper. Understand what happens at the top. It is a very different playing field from where you currently sit and see.

Here are four key perspectives from the top. Simulate them and deliver on your desires:

1) Get things done:
Effective bosses get things done. Yes, they may seem to have more ‘authority’ than people down the line, but never forget, no one enjoys absolute power. At every level there are challenges. The higher up you go in the corporate ladder, the more authority you end up having. But the demands placed upon you are equally big. Bosses appreciate people who can get things done. Think about it – your company seniors have goals to achieve, just like you. While plans need to be flexible, goals are fixed. They would never like to have people who persistently fail to meet objectives assigned and people who have a habit of coming up with excuses instead of desired results.

Recently, during a short break in our workshop, I came across some people who were discussing when was the right time to move from one company to another. They were evaluating the pros and cons of job shifting every two years. My suggestion to them was simple, “Consider moving only when you have made a visible, impactful & sustainable contribution to your existing workplace.” It is not how long you stay that matters – it is eventually what you deliver – the legacy you leave behind. Your move must be seamless, with a successor in place, before you venture to newer and bigger things.

2) Let solutions motivate
It is pointless to complain that bosses are de-motivating. Go-getters are internally motivated. They don’t rely on the external motivators like appreciation or a pat on the back – although it feels good to hear a nice word now and then! Your greatest motivation is your achievement – the work you get done. At the end of the day it revs up and adds spice to your resume and eventually your growth. Since the concept here is simulating the top, think and reflect who motivates your company/ organization/institution head. Who motivates your CEO? It is a lonely position, where at times you cannot openly share your fears and concerns as it may have a negative impact on the team. CEOs are usually motivated by the corporate results their team delivers. See your current job as a business. Be self-inspired and solution-oriented. ‘SOLO-U-TIONIST i.e. people who take responsibility for solutions are always in demand. I recently read a quote some where that said, I don’t like work… but I like what is in work — the chance to find yourself. Your own reality — for yourself, not for others — which no other man can ever know.

3) Promote teamwork
The person at the top understand that work gets done through teamwork. Functional silos and communication barriers kill efficiency and productivity. Therefore, learn to involve others in finding solutions to get things done! Last thing you want in your path to excellence is enemies – this in no ways means that you please everyone. By helping others achieve their goals, you will get cooperation from them In your own success.

Remember the story of the hare and tortoise? The message was ‘slow and steady wins the race’. Some years back I read another version*. Moral of the new story is that if we work together, combine energies, a much greater and better result can be achieved.  Even when eating food (assuming you eat with fingers) you need to use all your four fingers and your thumb, and they are all of different sizes.

Fairness in your approach with team players discourages biasness. Bosses are there not because they are technically more competent, but because they understand how to work with people and know the art of unleashing human genius by being fair and firm. That is leadership. To get to the top_ appreciate others’ contribution, and when necessary, hold people to account.

4) Coach yourself
We often hear that managers need to be coaches. But who coaches the top? You often find people down the line blaming  their seniors for not developing them. Change this paradigm. Learning is all around you. Be connected. There are people  around you who are your biggest coaches. People at the top visibly have no coaches, but use people around them as their coaches. Successful executives listen, observe, feel, sense, evaluate and talk to all kinds of people. They learn from every interaction thereby making effective decisions.

Getting to the top is an aspiration – but requires plenty of perspiration. It is not always as sweet as it looks on the top.  It takes great responsibility to be at the helm of affairs – be aware of what you wish for and prepare yourself at every point along the way.

In case you are at the top, sit with your team members/direct reports and clarify what you expect from them and how this essay could be a document for commencing a dialogue on succession planning and management development in your organization.

So you want to get to the top?

Has any of this happened to you?

- Your boss ends your Monday with a stack of papers and instructions that you must submit this report in the next 48 hours or else…

- Your significant other doesn’t answer your calls when you need to get a hold of them the most

- Your mother sends you Guilt-Tripping messages that you don’t come and visit enough

- Your landlord Completely ignores you when you tell her that part of the ceiling is leaking in your apartment

- Your credit card bill is getting HUGE and is taking over in your dreams

At this point your probably starting to feel a throbbing pain in your temples like your head is about to explode.

EASY does it.

You certainly don’t want that to happen now do you?

Sit down and take a deep breath, close your eyes, relax and unravel your inner thoughts.

Sometimes, when taking control over a chaotic life, a stressful situation, a physical ailment or an emotional dilemma, it will usually start within you – your mind, and specifically, your “Subconscious”.

Communicating with your subconscious doesn’t have to be seen as being difficult.

Negotiating with your own self(Yes, I know it sounds kind of crazy, but hear me out) can be ‘achieved’ through a form of mind control called “Self-Hypnosis”.

Some of you reading this article right now may of heard of this practice and know How To do it, but for those of you who don’t here’s a sample of this basic procedure in 7 easy to follow steps.

Step #1. Find a venue conducive for relaxation.

Find a quite room, with a comfortable temperature and set the lights just right (not too dim, not too bright).

Then… light a candle and incense if you desire.

Step #2. Surround yourself with sound pleasant to your ears.

Play some relaxing music. Bring in a portable fountain. Hang some chimes where the breeze blows.

WHY?

Because the sound of music is soothing.

Step #3. Find a comfortable position.

Surround yourself with the things that make you feel the most comfortable. For example, your pillows, blankets, your favorite pair if joggers, whatever you like.

A caring, healing sensation always eases stress.

Step #4. Tell yourself this.

I am light, I am comfortable, I am at ease with myself.

All my tensions, worries and anxieties are gone.

I am light, I am comfortable, I am at ease with myself.

(Repeat many times while breathing deeply and with your eyes closed.)

Step #5. Picture what you want your life to be.

Visualize every detail, every situation that you want to happen.

Imagine it So… as if it is really happening at this moment.

Step #6. Repeat step #4.

Breathe in, breathe out. Now… imagine yourself being surrounded by a bright, luminous light starting from your forehead until it fills the whole room.

Step #7. Wake Up!

Simply wake up when you’re ready and feel refreshed.

Repeat this procedure regularly as needed.

This exercise simply helps you clear your thoughts.

It may also lead you to Self-Revelations that will help you assess the situation on How you want to live your dreams.

It may or may not work, your goal may or may not be achieved – the universe has reasons humans may not fathom.

The important thing here is this: “Self-Hypnosis” will help you become a better, calmer person that’s More attuned to themselves, and more willing to help others.

With ALL your tensions and worries away, who knows what you may accomplish in the coming Days, Weeks, Months and Years that lie ahead.

Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.”  More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us.

You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of drink. You think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read thru her transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you might just be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?… Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend.”

We look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Wooh… what else could he ask for?” He stares at himself at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad would still work things out.”

Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation.

Sometimes, you notice that you have an irritating habit like biting off your finger nails, having a foul mouth, and you – of all people, is the last to know.

I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. And in most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends tend to avoid the circles whenever she’s  around, and she doesn’t notices how badly she became socially handicapped – gradually affecting the people in her environment.

One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle topics you want to discuss. Ask questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”,  “Do I always sound so argumentative?”,  “Do I talk too loud?”,  “Does my breath smell?”,  “Do I ever bore you when were together?”.  In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t give her answers like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!”  Open up your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help her improve her self.

One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. In order to love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have.

Before telling other people some ways on how to improve themselves, let them see that you yourself is a representation and a product of self improvement. Self improvement makes us better people, we then inspire other people, and then the rest of the world will follow.

Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings. Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on.  Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got  10 more reasons to envy them.

We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves.Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.

Self-improvement: improvement of one’s condition through one’s own efforts.

I often see myself as somewhat contented with my life the way things are, but of course it’s hard to think of anything else when there are real issues to be discussed.

Still I aspire for something deeper and more meaningful.

So we’re all pelted with problems. Honestly it shouldn’t even bother or even hinder us to becoming all we ought to be. Aspirations as kids should continue to live within us, even though it would be short-lived or as long as we could hold on to the dream. They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks… or can they?

1. What do I really want?

The question of the ages. So many things you want to do with your life and so little time to even go about during the day.

Find something that you are good at can help realize that small step towards improvement. Diligence is the key to know that it is worth it.

2. Should I really change?

Today’s generation has taken another level of redefining ‘self’, or at least that’s what the kids are saying. There are far worse things that they could have had than acne or maybe even promiscuity. So how does that fit into your lifestyle?

If history has taught us one thing, it’s the life that we have gone through. Try to see if partying Seventies style wouldn’t appeal to the younger generation, but dancing is part of partying. Watch them applaud after showing them how to really dance than break their bones in break-dancing.

3. What’s the bright side in all of this?

With so much is happening around us there seem to be no room for even considering that light at the end of the tunnel. We can still see it as something positive without undergoing so much scrutiny. And if it’s a train at the end of the tunnel, take it for a ride and see what makes the world go round!

4. Am I comfortable with what I’m doing?

There’s always the easy way and the right way when it comes to deciding what goes with which shoes, or purse, shirt and whatnot. It doesn’t take a genius to see yourself as someone unique, or else we’ll all be equally the same in everything we do. Variety brings in very interesting and exciting questions to be experimented.

5. Have I done enough for myself?

Have you, or is there something more you want to do? Discontentment in every aspect can be dangerous in large doses, but in small amounts you’ll be able to see and do stuff you could never imagine doing.

6. Am I happy at where I am today?

It’s an unfair question so let it be an answer! You love being a good and loving mom or dad to your kids, then take it up a notch! Your kids will love you forever. The same goes with everyday life! Do you earn enough money? Hate your job? Wanna start your own business?

7. Am I appealing to the opposite sex?

So maybe I don’t have an answer to that, but that doesn’t mean I can’t try it, though. Whether you shape-up, change the way you wear your clothes or hair, or even your attitude towards people, you should always remember it will always be for your own benefit.

8. How much could I have?

I suppose in this case there is no such things on having things too much or too little, but it’s more on how badly you really need it. I’d like to have lots of money, no denying that, but the question is that how much are you willing to work for it?

9. What motivates me?

What motivates you? It’s an answer you have to find out for yourself. There are so many things that can make everyone happy, but to choose one of the may be the hardest part. It’s not like you can’t have one serving of your favorite food in a buffet and that’s it. Just try it piece by piece.

10. What Really Makes You Tick?

So? What really makes you tick? You can be just about anything you always wanted to be, but to realize that attaining something that may seem very difficult is already giving up before you even start that journey. Always remember, that self-improvement is not just about the physical or philosophical change you have to undergo, but it’s something that you really want.

So there we have it. 10 simple questions to ask yourself. Do you want to improve? I do not have all the answers for you. You can only answer for yourself.

Someone once asked me :’Daryl, why you working so damn hard? Would earning more money make you happy?’

To that I answered :’I am not working hard at all. Not as hard as I should, but u enjoyed it. I enjoy the process and the rewards I get. Earning more money does make me happier. It pays for the bills, the nice ring I could get my wife and the vacation I deserve.’

Materialistic that reply may seem, but the little materialistic goals in my life gets me moving off my fat behind and seek ways to improve my life.

Self-improvement: improvement of one’s condition through one’s own efforts

I have my motivation. What about you ?